What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Randomize