flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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