You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize