My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
