I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
