I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
did you just send me my own nude
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
