I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
