I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Do vagina's smell?
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
