You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
