you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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