"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Life is so much better after having sex.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
