i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
