Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Randomize
