i jhust puked up my retainher.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
