Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
it glows. i had to have it.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Randomize
