We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize
