Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
is wine microwaveable?
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
