I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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