party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Randomize