Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
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