what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
