OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
