Life is so much better after having sex.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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