is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
