That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
