just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Is it because I queefed?
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
