His pubic hair was longer than his dick
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
