apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
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