She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
