so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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