lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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