It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Randomize
