Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
BRING THE BAGELS
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
