You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
