I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
this boner is exhausting
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
