So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
