My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
