so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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