Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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