The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
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