I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
sex in a hospital.. check
I need to sanitize my soul.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
