Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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