hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I'm passing your future prison.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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