They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize
