I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
