i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize