U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Say something about gay babies.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Randomize
