Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
You're breaking my sexual little heart
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Randomize
