was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
you had me at cake vodka
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Randomize
