it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
